[ standing outside the crying room and looking at the sign on the door. ]

Well, that's... both straightforward and extremely specific.

[ peers at it. ]

What happens if you don't cry.

Do you think they monitor it? I mean, setting up a room like this is kind of...

[ inviting misuse................ ]

If they monitor it, it's even worse.

[ gross!! don't watch people cry!! ]

Anyway. If you're going to fuck in public, grab a bathroom stall like a normal person.

Haha... Well, I kind of hope nobody's going to be doing that either...

[ at least if they're doing it in the crying room he won't be at risk of overhearing it ]

But yeah, it's pretty weird no matter how you look at it, huh?

The whole thing is weird, yeah. Like the fact that some pack of jackasses decided we didn't earn anything and we just kind of have to eat that.

Tch. Yeah. Like we got something so great out of it the first time anyway.

Yeah? No wishes or anything? [ dryly. where was her wish. ]

[ it's been like, a whole fucking year for him and that is still a sore spot. ]

I don't even want to talk about that.

[ help ]

That bad, huh. Which one was yours?

[ ugh he doesn't want to have to say THAT either... sighs and tells himself at least it isn't wenis......... ]

"Scawwy". [ with air quotes to establish that he knows how fucking stupid it sounds and no he does not have a speech impediment. ] It was the name of the village we were in.

Oh! [ snaps her fingers. ] The cult one. With Hillbilly or whatever the fuck his name was.

[ a little snort at the name. which he will not bother to correct. ]

Yeah, that's the one.

How about you?

Uhhh, the IDs called it Final Destinations. The city was called Key Nueve, though. Two weeks, robots and dancing rabbit people, plugged into a machine, escaped Death, yada yada.

Plugged into a machine...? Was the whole thing actually VR or something?

Like - what? [ a beat. she can probably context clues her way here. ] Like an arcade game, I guess. Our real bodies were out but our consciences were wandering around.

Not that it made a difference, dying still hurt.

Yeah, like that.

[ he considers that for a moment... he's not even sure how many stupid gag deaths he's had at this point, but he still does his damnedest to avoid it. ]

I guess that's fair.

It was way different than all this. All of you guys have this idea of what's going to happen, but we showed up, twenty three people exploded in a coaster accident or got stuck in a golf hole, and then we went home. Kind of.

That... kind of feels like it should be in a different genre, yeah. [ especially with the dancing rabbit people... what the fuck was this ] Did you even have actual murders or was it all just ridiculous accidents?

[ it's what happens when zetsu comes up with the set dressing is what it was

she rolls her shoulders. ]

Two people actually got murdered. A guy got turned into cheese and cut into pieces, and a girl got stabbed in the neck after a building fell on her.

[ I DIDN'T SEE THE MATCHING HAIRCUTS TEXT BEFORE I'M LOSING IT

anyway hello, we're at claire's. she has a tattoo that's over the top of her tattoo and she keeps itching at it. nyeh.

she's got the sign and she's looking at it... ]

Feet pics? What? Why.

I... think you could ask that about a whole lot of things on that sign.

Sure, but why specifically - you know. Never mind.

[ puts the sign down. ]

Oh. Yeah, it's. It's a thing some people are into for some reason.

Jot me down as not one of those people.

[ thanks we all needed to know this, vi ]

This place is an assault on the eyes.

Yeah, I'm definitely also on that list. Honestly one of the worst parts...

[ he does still have his own weird kink but at least it's not feet. ]

Some of the stuff here is kind of fun? Or, like, it would be if it wasn't obviously the cheapest plastic in the world. Cute in theory.

[ at least it is not feet. ]

We don't have anything like this at home. [ plucks a nail polish bottle off a shelf, looking it over. ] The store, I mean, we've got polish.

Like, this kind of style, you mean? Or mall accessory shops more generally?

Both, I guess. We don't really have malls in the Undercity?

There's something like that above ground, probably.

So the place you lived in was entirely underground?

Mostly underground. There's an above ground part, but it's still shit.

Sounds pretty depressing... like you could have used some cute plastic junk to brighten things up, actually.

There are still people up on the surface in other cities, though? I was thinking it was going to be like one of those stories where all of humanity has to retreat underground because something happened to make the surface uninhabitable.

My sister would've liked that, probably.

[ a huff of a laugh, though. ] You know you're the second person to say that? No, there's people up there. A whole city - Piltover. Cleaner, prettier, richer.

Ours is the uninhabitable bit. The fissures make people sick.

[ it's a popular trope!! ]

What? Then why are you there, did they just banish everyone they didn't like to the shitty underground place?

[ shrug. ]

Lost the coin toss? I don't know. Not rich enough to get up to the top or leave, so. You have to live somewhere.